The wind embraced me as we walked over to the playground. I was away from home but I felt closer than ever. I felt like I was flying. While the rest of my classmates ran around the sand pit, went up the slide in reverse direction, I took in the moment and took a deep breath. I felt peace.
*
Again I felt myself zoning out and yet I was so focused. The air was salty. The breeze cleansed my soul. The smooth sand caressed my feet. I was alone but very much accompanied. Though the water brushed painstakingly past my legs I no longer felt it after a while. I was immersed in love with the beauty of nature.
**
Where did it all go? My mind races but nothing is accomplished. I no longer have that tranquility.
***
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Even though your blog post was a little short, I really liked it! I loved how you described everything. You used a sense of contradiction which I found very intriguing as I thought it made for a more meaningful story. For instance, in the sentence “I was away from home but I felt closer than ever” as well as, “I was alone but very much accompanied” are both sentences that accomplish said contradiction. I think you did a great job on this blog. Your sentences were short and sweet and achieved what I think you set out to do. I just wish your story was a little longer because I would have loved to read more!
ReplyDeleteI liked the way you captured the simple aspect of three voice. At first I wasn’t sure that was the essay you were doing. I was wondering though because it’s called three voices was it suppose to be from three different perspectives. I noticed that Bhanu Kapil Rider used three different voices. The man’s, hers, and her voice in the third person. I also chose this essay because of the deeper meaning that was said but not. I really enjoyed when you said, “I was alone but very much accompanied.” That was similar to the essay, I loved it. Great post simple just in sentences just like the essay.I also wanted to apologize for not publishing my post I clicked the wrong button.
ReplyDeleteMercedes